LOL WAIT CAN SOMEONE WRITE A FANFIC WHERE WADE IS BLOWING PETER WHILE HE’S ON THE PHONE WITH TONY AND TONY TOTALLY KNOWS WHATS GOING ON BUT PETER IS TRYING NOT TO MAKE IT OBVIOUS
I FEEL LIKE THIS WOULD BE HILARIOUS OMG
too bad i cant write for shit
I SO agree! XDD
I’ve never written anything like this before, so lets see how it goes?
Away in his dungeon of awesomeness, Tony is in the midst of a new project. He is interupted by the familiar voice of JARVIS;
"Mister Peter Parker on the phone, sir."
"Put him through. Spidey-Guy! What’s happenin’?"
"Hey, Tony. I had a favor to ask of you?"
Tony continues about his business while Peter pitches his idea. Something about a requirment that he do more than JUST Spiderman photos, try something new.
"So, I’ve got Wade coming over for a photoshoot, and I was hoping to line you up for one as well?"
"Sounds fine, call Pepp and set something up."
"I spoke to her all-" There’s a thumping from Peter’s end of the phone. “Just a sec, Tony." The audio is muffled as Peter covers the mic, but Tony can still just make out what is said. “Hey, Wade. Come in. I’m the phone with Tony now. Just make yourself… um, Wade?" There’s a rustling and a woomf of air like someone just collapsed onto a beanbag. “Wade? Wade, this is not what I meant by Photoshoot. Not…now.. oh, god."
"Everything fine over there, spandex?"
"Y-yeah, can I call you back?" There’s a loud, exaggerated slurping from peter’s end which causes one of Tony’s brows to raise. A smirk crosses his face and he sits back in his seat, leaving his work alone for a moment.
"Nope, sorry buddy, no can do. I am booked all day. If you want to set this up, now is the time."
Muffled curses come from Peter’s end.
"Yeah, ok. uh." Peters voice comes out slightly strained.
"You seem a little distracted, there, bug-boy."
"Yeah, sorry… just…Hmm… just a little tingle in my senses."
"Riiiight. I’m sure something’s tingling. Hey, are you cumming?"
"What?" Peter squeaks on the other end.
"Are you coming to my big bash tomorrow? We can set up your thing there."
"Oh, god, yes."
"You can bring Wilson with you. But tell him he needs to stop sucking down weiners." Tony pauses a moment to add effect. “The other guests enjoy a good hot dog too."
"Okay. yeah. I’ll," there’s a long pause from Peter. The mic is muffled again but a rather breathy moan is still just audible. “I’ll be there. Tomorrow… what time?"
"Seven. Wear something nice."
"Right. See you then!"
There’s a thump as the phone is set aside. It’s not readily apparant to Peter that he has failed to hang up and has just set the phone down.
"Sir?" JARVIS pipes in again. “Is Peter aware he called you via video phone?"
"Doesn’t seem like it."
"Shall I inform him?"
"Hmm…. Nah, go ahead and just record this, might be useful later."
With his regular music replaced now by something slightly more disturbingly entertaining, Tony continues his work.
Not the best quality work, short ‘n’ sweet, and I am sure far less smutty than desired, but… it’s something ~_^